by | 11/29/2013 · 4:49 pm

Thankful, circa 2013

Saying goodbye at Japanese restaurant Teppen

Saying goodbye at Japanese restaurant Teppen

It’s that time of year again when I look back on the past 11 months and post about stuff I’ve liked under the guise of being thankful for it. Which I am, really. I’m thankful for my family, my friends, and the fact that 2013 was a pretty great year, food-wise.  I’ve managed to make a fool of myself in eight different countries this year, some of them twice! I have tried goat testicle sashimi, rancid fermented bean paste, deep-fried pork cracklings rolled in Thai spices, and countless varieties of booze squeezed from bits of wheat, barley or rice. It’s been a busy year.

But there have been some great discoveries I’ve managed to make at home, too. And — no, I’m not talking a discovery like: “don’t try to make your soon-to-be-teenage daughter feel better by pointing out that setbacks are actually a learning experience” (a revelation I have just had in the past five minutes). I’m talking I’m-gonna-want-to-put-this-in-my-mouth discoveries. Strictly culinarily, of course.

I’m thankful for:

1. Teppen. It’s on Sukhumvit Soi 61, about 50 m from the entrance to the soi, on the right hand side right before you reach Park Lane (one of the neighborhood’s many, many community malls). It looks like a house and there’s not really any visible sign from the road, so it can be tricky to find. Basically, Teppen is an izakaya masquerading as some sort of sushi bar. The real stars here — aside from the “sushi” chefs who put on a “salmon show” where they race to fillet a salmon each, while shirtless — are the different types of sake on offer, which are numerous and delicious. So delicious, in fact, that my friend passed out in the bathroom here after maybe one too many. Please do not do this. I want to be able to dine here for many months to come.

Seared tuna at Teppen

Seared tuna at Teppen

2. Gai Thong. Located on Sena Nikom 1 Road, near Phaholyothin (02-579-3898), this place isn’t really that easy to get to for Sukhumvit dwellers like me. However, this unassuming little restaurant with the type of atmosphere that translates into “Isaan diner” is worth taking the trip. What I like about this place is, essentially, the chicken: a combination of both juicy and meaty — something you don’t see much in tandem anymore. What is this craze for dry, mealy gai yang (grilled chicken)? Is this something akin to the Bangkokian fondness for the candy-sweet som tum (grated papaya salad) that will inevitably accompany it? Are cottonmouth and sugary sweetness supposed to complement each other somehow? I don’t get Isaan restaurants in Bangkok nowadays.

Gai Thong's grilled chicken

Gai Thong’s grilled chicken

Incidentally, the som tum here is too sweet, too. I think I am doomed to wandering an infinite number of dusty Bangkok streets, eternally in search of a good som tum that doesn’t come straight from the top of a cart.

3. Places you’ve already heard about. If you have been anywhere in Bangkok lately, you have probably already heard of Appia and Opposite Mess Hall. These restaurants have only opened up in the past year! That is how quickly time flies. And then we all die. What was I saying before? …

So, what do I love about these places? Well, let me tell you guyz one thing for starters: I love artichokes. Marry me, artichokes. And Appia’s deep-fried artichokes (carciofi alla giudea) = one of my favorite foods in the world + the only place in the city that serves them. Also, co-owner Jarrett Wrisley is one of the best front of the house guys in the city. I’ve said this before, but I don’t try to say this too often because I suspect he suspects I may be trying to stalk him. <cue uncomfortable laughter>.

So, let me tell you another thing. I don’t really like chocolate all that much. No, seriously. I know this invalidates all the opinions I have spouted on this website previously, and that no one will ever listen to me anymore, and I will be alone forever. That is sad, but, I am all about The Truth. Except when it comes to the freaking Marou chocolate tart at Opposite Mess Hall. Marou is a chocolate maker from Vietnam who grows and processes its own chocolate. The fruits of its labors are then brought to Bangkok, where they are baked into a pie crust and somehow morph into food for the gods.

OMH's Marou chocolate tart

OMH’s Marou chocolate tart

Opposite Mess Hall has other great dishes too, and seasonal specials like yada yada yada. I am sure they are good. I don’t know. All I can think about is this tart, which is a shame, because I prayed at the Erawan Shrine and promised to give up desserts FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. So I don’t go into Opposite much, just in case this tart tempts me into straying. This is my life now, people. But in spite of this stupid silly vow, I still have a lot to be thankful for. Like pictures of chocolate tarts.

 

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by | 11/19/2013 · 2:17 pm

Where the beef is

"Crunchy" wagyu beef with rice vermicelli at Pu Raithiemthan

“Crunchy” wagyu beef with rice vermicelli at Pu Raithiemthan

Noodle soups are a pillar of Thai street food; in fact, Thai street food probably wouldn’t exist without it. It was probably the first type of street food to appear in Bangkok, brought to our shores from the Chinese immigrants to sold this dish alongside the canals that criss-crossed the city at the time.

Noodle soups are still everywhere to be found in Bangkok, in hundreds of different iterations. The easiest way to categorize them, though, is through the protein used: chicken, fish, pork, and of course, beef. Although many Thais don’t eat beef for religious reasons, beef is still a popular option — and getting more popular as time goes by, if the number of vendors offering Japanese beef options are anything to go by.

 

Time was, you had to traipse all the way into Chinatown to get a chance at some super-expensive obsessively massaged, sake-fed beef, sold in an alleyway in the shadow of a temple. Now, there are a handful of brave beef noodle vendors who offer your choice of Wagyu, Kobe or even Matsuzaka Japanese beef varieties, and not just in the confines of an air-conditioned luxury mall. Now you, too, can sweat in an open-air dining room, just like any other common prole with his or her bowl of yen ta fo. 

The menu at Pu Raitiemtan

The menu at Pu Raitiemthan

Introducing Pu Raitiemthan, set out on Pracha Uthit Road across from Kesinee KIS School. Their beef — which you can order either krob (“crunchy”, usually a cut of beef shank that’s been simmered in beef broth), thun (stewed) or sod (“fresh”, or blanched slices of beef to order) — is sourced from Japan, Australia and Thailand (although the owner tells us he may stop ordering some cuts of Thai beef such as the “rugby” cut, due to inconsistent quality). You can have any of these preparations (or any kind of combination) with noodles (gub guaythiew), or with just broth or “dry” (gowlow nam or hang), accompanied by a small bowl of noodles or rice on the side that has been sprinkled with bits of deep-fried garlic. Here at Pu (and I’m sorry, since it’s a common Thai nickname meaning “crab”, but I do refuse to use the more popular spelling “Poo”), if they are not using the Thai varieties, they like to use Wagyu for their krob beef, Kobe for their stewed beef, and either Matsuzaka or Kobe for their freshly blanched beef.

Some beef vendors are known for their broth, and some are known for their meatballs, but the folks at Pu are known for their way with their cuts of beef: using exactly those cuts that are suited for their particular treatments. That goes for Thai beef too — never tough,  always fresh, with a nice meaty heft to the broth that ensures you clean your bowl even after the beef is all gone.

Pu Raitiemthan

Pracha Uthit Road across from Kesinee Ville compound

Open: 10am-8pm (or until they are sold out)

081-134-8348, 089-055-4847

Fresh Kobe beef and stewed beef in broth "gowlow"

Fresh Kobe beef and stewed beef in broth “gowlow”

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by | 11/08/2013 · 2:46 pm

Hamburger heaven

The Thaiger burger with bacon

The Thaiger burger with bacon

When I just moved to Bangkok, a guy called me up. I was still new to the whys and hows of life here and was still bewildered by things like who wais who if you look the same age. So this guy called me up, and after what seemed like hours of talking about his hair, when he casually said I should “come over to his house and make him a sandwich”, I thought WOW GUYS IN BANGKOK DON’T MESS AROUND.

It turns out this fool probably really did want me to come over to his house and smoosh two slices of Wonder bread around a piece of baloney. Because since then I’ve learned that there is this weird thing about guys and their sandwiches. Let me put it another way: What is it about guys and sandwiches? I don’t get it. It’s not like it’s hard to do. Any idiot with two hands should be able to figure it out. Yet the fetishization of sandwiches not only lingers, but has grown, to zit-on-picture-day-like proportions. Case in point: the lady who was challenged by her boyfriend to make him 300 sandwiches before he proposed. You know what I’m talking about. Just in case you don’t, you can check out this link here: http://300sandwiches.com. Smart. So smart. This woman will get a cookbook deal and will be played by someone like Amy Adams in the upcoming movie. And all because her boyfriend is a doofus who can’t make his own sandwiches.

So I don’t get sandwiches in general, but I do understand hamburgers. This is a big thing for me. I can maybe say that, besides Buffalo wings, this is possibly THE thing. It’s because I live in Bangkok, where correctly-rendered versions of either of these dishes are about as rare as a talking unicorn made of ice cream. Too often, “Buffalo” wings mean deep-fried chicken wings slathered in a honey-barbecue sauce. Once, I ordered Buffalo wings at a hamburger place (these two dishes often go together under the rubric of “American shit no one else will eat”), only to be presented with a dry tangle of limbs that resembled an evil vulture’s nest. They told me the Buffalo wings were “spicy Thai wings”. WHY DON’T YOU CALL THEM SPICY THAI WINGS?

Hamburgers are similarly mistreated here. I think it is because Thais — and possibly Asians in general — misunderstand what the point of a hamburger is. A hamburger is about the meat — the beef, to be specific. It’s about having a great big slab of beef, fully grained, charred and juicy, subtly mitigated by a fluffy bun and maybe some crunchy green crap on top. A hamburger is supposed to taste like MEAT. But Thais, possibly because there aren’t as many beef eaters as in other countries, don’t really believe this. They want a patty that has everything but the kitchen sink in it — onions, garlic, carrots, whatever — in a round of something that has been minced and pounded until it resembles a fine meat frisbee. It’s the Mosburger approach to hamburgers, and it is ruining all the burgers in this town. I don’t care how many Japanese people you get to eat it.

It comes as no surprise, then, that Daniel Thaiger draws a line of hungry hamburger-lovers even before they open at around 6pm. Recent LA transplants Mark and Honey run their hamburger business out of a white food truck parked at the far end of Sukhumvit Soi 38, on the right side of the road on even-numbered days, and on the left side on odd. Like all good street food, the menu is simple and straight to the point: burgers, tasting of meat and smoke fresh from the grill, with bacon and/or cheese, wrapped in a soft bun and a wax paper sleeve that doesn’t quite keep you from looking like a big slob as you’re eating. And yes, there are pork versions too. But come quickly, because these folks often sell out by 8.30pm.

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